An Introvert Goes to the Club

A rotund gentleman’s hairy, pale belly bulges out from underneath a crop top. His sweatpants are tugged down just enough to reveal some ass crack. He wears a shoulder-length, curly blonde wig and yells in a sing-song voice, “Baby gets to go home with Daddy, oh yes! Baby loves it!” His Daddy is a petite, normal-looking fellow who appears to be in great spirits. I clomp past them in my platforms, headed for the club entrance.

I live in a part of town now where I can easily walk to great restaurants, bars, and other nightlife. I’m not a bar kind of gal but you’ll find me there on occasion, usually because some of my friends want to meet there. So I’ll grudgingly go. Such was the case last weekend, when a friend I hadn’t seen in about a year was in town and she wanted to meet up at a drag/gay bar down the street. Downstairs they have drag shows, upstairs they have a dance floor and naughty leather shop. I’d been to this bar once before many years ago and had a good time at a girl’s birthday party. We watched some of the drag performers entertain and they were fantastic. This time, though, it was insanely busy. By the time I arrived, there was a line out the door and the drag shows were already over with. Inside, you couldn’t even move without grinding your pelvis on someone else.

My friends were upstairs. A flamboyant young thing wearing an open Hawaiian shirt and tons of Mardis Gras beads made me a rum and coke with as much flair as he could. A gentleman in drag with gorgeous makeup winked at me from a stool nearby, sipping a bright pink concoction with an umbrella. He had the longest eyelashes and a plump coral pout. A dazzling multi-color sequin cocktail dress and heels higher than I’d be comfortable wearing completed the look. I smiled, took my rum and coke, and squeezed into the next room. I spied the security man bursting into the men’s bathroom to make sure no one was fooling around in there. As I was alone and dressed somewhat sexier than normal, I could feel hungry, horny eyes on me as I squeezed through the crowd towards my friends.

I entered the dance room which whumped, thumped, and buzzed. Horny couples and small groups were sandwiched together, and a couple shirtless male dancers thrusted and gyrated on some lighted platforms. My old friend attempted to converse with me but it was nearly impossible from all the bass blasting. We downed some jello shots and danced for a bit. And I use the term “dance” loosely, for I like to improvise in a big way. Sometimes I pretend like I’m teetering on the edge of a cliff. Sometimes I waddle and flap like a penguin. And sometimes I bop my head and move my hips in unnatural ways that elicit looks of confusion. Oh well. Everyone else was too busy jamming their tongues down each other’s throats. One of the girls with us decided at random intervals to let one boob pop out of her top, jiggle around for a bit, and then pop back in. Another girl in our group sported little pigtails and an anime backpack with a teeny tiny lace skirt, garters, and huge stompy goth boots. Her job the entire night was to hug everyone in sight and squeal. Despite the alcohol I wasn’t really enjoying myself since I appreciate having s p a c e. So I stayed maybe an hour and a half at most and couldn’t wait to get the hell out of there for some fresh air.

As a strong introvert, this place was a living nightmare. I love people no matter their sexual preference but what I don’t love is a thick crowd and constant audio stimulation unless I’m paying to see a concert. Sometimes as an introvert you must make little sacrifices and step out of your comfort zone to keep in touch with people you adore.

If you need me I’ll be taking the rest of the week off to recover.


13 thoughts on “An Introvert Goes to the Club

  1. Babe, you’re in your element down there and it shows! A place like that would give me a makeover I’d never recover from, ha,ha,ha, I’m not that BAD tho, I would never, could never . . . oh, alrighty then, alright! Make me over! Love the fun people 🙂 🙂 ❤ ❤

      • Well I’m no spring chicken! I once danced on a table in a famous london club, (yeah after a few drinks) – I would be very surprised to find myself doing that now! I still love the atmosphere of clubs, people in cool clothes and all that, I just don’t do the “everyone look at me” thing no more, people would go, “Get that old fool down off of there!” (Back then they probably thought WTF? Is that guy out his nut or what?? 😀 😀

      • Those were the days! It was the Marquee Club, legendary venue – I remember sort of thinking, “Shall I?” Then I thought, “yeah, I will” LOL Its a small country this, I was one of the nuttiest on the scene that season, I remember jumping out of the balcony at a place called “The Lyceum” simply cos I thought it would be a drag to go down the stairs! We lived about an hr from London by train, so we used to get a load of booze and get sozzled on the way down, then attempt to turn the city upside down 😀

        Cage dancing is pretty damn cool tho Drac, I really love those places on TV and films where everyone is doing the rabid dance, it looks so fantastic! 🙂

      • I googled the club – I can picture the shenanigans going down! Sometimes you just have to do your own thing and make your own rules. I love it! Forget the stairs. Also “sozzled,” I’m going to borrow that word. Rabid dance? I do the rabbit dance, with my pretend paws and buck teeth…nibbling on carrots and having a grand old time.

  2. I feel ya on the introvert part. I nearly come unglued with pelvis grinding thick crowds and heavily distorted loud music with normal discussion shouted over the music. But heck, anything for a friend (in introverted moderation, of course) loved the scene description. I knew it was going to be great when the story opened with Baby going home with Daddy. I had a good visual and for an instant, I had the urge to use my electric toothbrush on my eyes. Damn! That was vivid. 😄

    • Thank you, I’m glad it came alive for you while reading and thank goodness you left those peepers alone! I’ll have to write a fiction piece next on Baby and Daddy’s big adventure. 😀

  3. Ah I remember my goth club days. The music and the dancing where exquisite, and when I was younger, I wasn’t as averse to the crowds. Granted, I also made sure I went where they weren’t so thick, and if the press became too much, there were plenty of hidey holes to escape to. It seems you did more than your fair share of time there, more than enough to give us this lovely piece.

    • I wish we had a club here specifically for goths but we just have random goth nights, and the darker shows tend to be at this one club that mostly has punk or metal shows. Guess I’d have to go to NY or LA! Wait, you’re saying the press was around when you went to clubs, like taking pictures and video and such?

      Yes I’d say I’ve done my time for sure – I’m nearly deaf to prove it, too. 😀 Thanks for reading.

      • I’ve noticed that most goth clubs are like that. I live near Philly and there used to be something called Nocturne every Wednesday night at this club called Shampoo. It was an institution, and so many people were sad when it ended. They tried to move it to another location, but that fizzled out quickly. There was this other place that had goth night on Saturdays, but again, it was just that night. I’ve heard that London is really huge in it, which makes sense since the punk/goth scene arguably originated there. That’s on my bucket list. I don’t care how old I am!

        Oh no no on! I meant the press like the press of people lol. I was trying to be poetic and instead I obfuscated the meaning *headdesk*

        I’m pretty sure my hearing has suffered, too hehe. My husband doesn’t understand why I have to turn the TV up so high, but I can’t hear things as clearly as I could.

      • Indeed, not surprised about London – I’m sure I’ll make it there someday, too. There’s something so powerful sounding about being called an “elder goth!” Haha.

        If I had it my way I’d combine my love for fitness with dark music and create some classes geared towards the darkly-inclined, and perhaps the space could also host some goth nights.

        Ohh, my bad. I did think it a bit strange that the press would be lurking around, trying to catch goths dancing and just get wild pictures of them, haha!

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